When I grow up?  I had to giggle a little at this one, but I do like to think that I always continue to grow and change and better myself.  So, who would I like to emulate?  The first person that comes to mind is Myrtle.  I had a cousin who was much older than myself that I always thought very highly of.  She was always so welcoming and warm.  I met her for the first time when I was 12.  She was in her 50s.  She lived in Tennessee and had a little farm.  I remember at that time she had some cows and chickens.  We would visit just about every summer from that point on.  I loved to go and pick blacberries along her fence in the backyard.  What was special about Myrtle?  Myrtle was strong and caring.  She NEVER spoke a bad word about someone.  Believe me there were plenty of things to say about some folks…but she never said anything but kind things about them.  She always was open and shared so much of herself.  Even into her 90′s her mind was sharp and she remembered little details about you that made you feel so loved and special.  And I think she truely did LOVE everyone.

Who else would I like to emulate?  So many special people come to mind, but another that stands out is my Aunt Virginia.  Aunt Virginia was loving, funny and knew how to run a household with very little.  She was frugal.  They had little money when I was growing up but they all were dressed nice, the house was clean, the clothes were clean, and they were well fed.  She had 5 children and her house was always spotless.  I can’t manage that with two.  Funny though that my cousin (Aunt Virginia’s daughter) recently told me that she loved my mother.  That my mother was a people person.  People came first and foremost.  If you were a guest in my mother’s house (or a child for that matter), she’d set aside whatever she was doing (the dishes would wait was the way my cousin put it) and you felt the center of her world.  I guess I’d really like to have both of those qualities in a good balance.

Another person I would like to be like is my oldest sister Brenda.  Brenda has set some high goals in her life and accomplished them.  She works daily helping others who need help.  (She is a Psychologist and a Professor of Psychology).  Her home is not perfect but it is clean and her family feels loved with the attention they need and she gets time for herself as well.  She is a good manager of time to allow for herself and others.  She to is caring and loving and you feel good to be with her.

As I’m writing this I’m seeing that I really want to be a people person and make others feel the specialness that is them.  One of my favorite quotes is from Pablo Casals.  “You are a marvel”.  I want to tell others that they are marvels and help them to realize the marvel that they are.

Each second we live is a new and unique moment of the universe, a moment that will never be again . . .And what do we teach our children? We teach them that two and two make four, and that Paris is the capital of France.

When will we also teach them what they are?

We should say to each of them: Do you know what you are? You are a marvel. You are unique. In all the years that have passed, there has never been another child like you. Your legs, your arms, your clever fingers, the way you move.

You may become a Shakespeare, a Michaelangelo, a Beethoven. You have the capacity for anything. Yes, you are a marvel. And when you grow up, can you then harm another who is, like you, a marvel?

You must work – we must all work – to make the world worthy of its children.

by:  Pablo Casals

This has been a quite busy week and a half.  My inlaws were in last week and left early this week.  The kids had Monday off and we celebrated Chinese New Years Eve on Saturday night.  I worked from the moment I woke up each day until the moment I hit the bed in the evenings on Thursday thru Saturday night, but the food was good and so was the company.  We had a great time together eating all that Chinese Food.  Yummy!

I’m trying to get caught up on “regular” things now and go back to my “focus”.  These next few days I want to go back and look at my personal vision.  I’ve written one several years ago but I think it’s time to revisit it and “focus” (my word for this year).  So here is my task.  I’m going to take some time each day to think on one of these questions below.  In my journal I’m going to write my thoughts and answers, then after I’ve really taken some time to think about it rewrite my vision.

• Who are three people I would like to model when I grow up?
• What things did my hero do that I would like to accomplish?
• What traits did my heros have that I would like to have?
• What do I have to learn to be like my heros?
• What are my skills now that I would like to get better at?
• Write a personal vision statement for my life.

After all the worries and false calls…the fish died.  He died on Friday.  DD was the first to notice and she took it very matter of fact.  I had to laugh.  I worried about the fish dying mostly because she was so proud and happy about it.  She came and said, “Mom, I think my fish is dead.  Can I get another one?”  So we sent him off on his final adventure and went Saturday to buy a new fish.  She selected a “pink” fish.  I wanted the pretty blue one, but she was adamant…PINK!  So now I have a new friend sitting on my sill above the sink.  He appears much more “normal” than the last fish.  No fake outs thus far. 

Yesterday my husband and I cleared out the kids rooms and rearranged the furniture.  DS agreed to taking down his bunk beds and creating two single beds.  I have never been more excited about an idea he’s had.  No more making up bunk beds…I hated that task!  He has not stopped talking about his room and how much nicer it is.  Mom and Dad are thrilled too and the fact that he loves it makes it all the more.  Woo who.

DD’s room is less crowded as I moved all toys but her babies out of the room.  I re hung her chain for her stuffed animals and it looks much better as well.  Now I’m down to two rooms.  I need to finish up our great room today and then our room tomorrow.  The great room will be a chore…our room is just a matter of dusting etc.  I think I may have my house together by Lunar New Year this time.  It is feeling so good.  I really understand how DS is feeling inside about his room…I’m feeling the same way about the house.  Moving around and freshening up really makes life more exciting.

I started Weight Watchers on Thursday.  I am mortified by my weigh in weight and won’t share.  I don’t think I’ve done very well, but I haven’t been horrible either.  I figure every little improvement is progress.  And as long as I keep progressing I will eventually I’ll make it.  Today is FOCUS DAY for me…so that will be one of the areas I will focus more on and set some very realistic goals for this week.  My clean up and clear out is moving right along.  As mentioned earlier my focus will be my great room and then my bedroom this week.  Woo who!

We have another storm system heading in today. They are expecting severe storms this evening.  We may be sleeping in the hallway tonight.  If we move in there at bedtime then we’re already set in case the storms do come in and DH won’t feel the need to wake us.  That’s my theory anyway.  But I know better than to really believe it.  He gets so nervous that I’m sure it will be a pretty much sleepless night. 

Happy Monday!  Until next time…

My husband and daughter went to a Daddy Daughter Dance last Saturday night.  All of the little girls came home with tiaras, roses, goody bags and one other “gift”.  My daughters happened to be a FISH.  Yes, she brought home a fish in a little fish bowl!  It’s one of those beta fish that like to be neglected.  (Thank goodness for that!)  She was so thrilled with this little guy.  She had food and everything she needed.  She goes every afternoon to feed him and is very dedicated to caring for her little guy.

I remember once reading an article about the health benefits of animals.  In this particular article the woman was questioning the validity of the fact that animals can help people with health issues to overcome.  She referenced among other things a rabbit that wouldn’t die and the day that her dog ate her daughter’s hamster leaving the only tell tale sign, a nose, which the mother picked up, (not realizing what she was picking up) trying to figure out what that little pink thing on the floor was.  She talked about the years of life that she lost when she realized what she held in her hand.  Well, I have to side with this woman on the issue of this darned fish.  In the past three days I can not tell you how many times it has caused my heart to skip a beat.  This fish sits on a shelf right above my sink where I clean the dishes.  Once I saw him sitting at the bottom of the bowl, not moving.  I thought “Oh, no!  He’s dying!”  So I pick up the bowl to see what I can do for him and he starts swimming around even jumping from the water.  OK…so he ain’t so sick.  Well that same scenario has occured often in the past few days.  I finally realized, this fish will “sit” on the bottom of the bowl and he’s okay.  So…this afternoon I walk in and the fish is lying on it’s side…very still.  My heart skips a beat again.  Poor DD, she will be so upset.  I tap the bowl…no movement.  OK…guess it’s time to visit that great bowl, also known as the throne, where many fish go after they die.  I pick up the bowl and head to the bathroom…up jumps this fish, swimming around and happy as can be.  Now I’m thinking…”In his final days, how long will this little guy sit in the bottom of his bowl before I realize he’s been dead for days!”  At least as long as it takes for him to start smelling.  UGH!

This is normally my cropping day but last night I decided to cancel out.  One friend called and said that she wasn’t feeling well and the other one is usually distracted by her little girl and thus doesn’t get to do much anyway.  I have tons to do to prepare for our garage sale coming up this Friday.  And I could use the extra time to work on that.  Today my focus is my son’s room.  Going thru and purging.  I’m so excited about all that is leaving the doors of this house.  Whatever doesn’t sell on Friday will be heading to Goodwill on Friday afternoon or Saturday morning.  

But first things first.  I’m going to have coffee.  My friend Becky, with the little one, is on her way over with Starbucks.  Yum, Starbucks and some conversation.  Who can refuse.  

In the events of this past week, I’ve had some time to reflect and have also been looking at some old photos.  Amazing what 17 years will do to a person’s body.  I’m thinking my body is in need of some real attention for many reasons.  Number one being that my family needs me to be the healthiest me I can be.  I’m still sticking with my goal of cleaning up and clearing out the clutter in this house.  I’m excited to be making such good progress in that area.  The Heidi Swapp class that I’m taking has really helped a great deal in keeping focus on my goal and I am loving the results.  So for now, my focus in our home.  But I’m going to add a side focus on me as well and work on eating breakfast EVERY morning and drinking more water.  When I get that under control (I give myself 3 weeks) then I’ll add the routine of daily walking or some other form of exercise.  If I lose one pound a week (that’s a very reasonable goal) then I’ll be where I need to be in less than a year.   That to me is exciting.  In one years time I’ll have my house where I want it and my weight.  The key to it all is FOCUS.  And somewhere along the line that always seems to happen that I lose focus.  I’m trying to come up with some ideas that will do a check weekly on my goals and reinforce my focus.  I thought something as simple as writing the word “FOCUS” on my calendar each week might help.  On that day I’ll have to weigh in, and also do a mental check of where I’m at and what goals I need to work on that week.  So that is where I’m starting.  Monday will be “FOCUS” day.  Any other ideas to help maintain focus are greatly appreciated.  Whatever it is will have to be VERY simple and direct.  I have little “extra” time as it is.  I’m expecting that as time goes on and things fall more and more in place that more time to do what I love will be created.  My theory is the less I have, the more I’ll have of what I truly want.  Less Stuff, less weight, more time, more health.  So with coffee in hand I drink!  “To a healthy household, healthy me, year!”